Moving Forward

I have now lived in Goma for over a month. The adventures of the daily commute from Maji to HEAL have worn off and walking through the volcanic streets has become routine. The projects that I am working on have lost some momentum and I find myself discouraged.

I think my discouragement is fueling the fire of frustration that I have been slowly building these past couple weeks. My frustration comes from being an outsider in this world of insiders. I am a foreigner working in a local organization. It is difficult because I am here for an adventure, for experience and I am working with people where this is everyday life.

When you are traveling through a certain town or city there isn’t time for this feeling of being stagnant. You are constantly moving and therefore, like a car, easily roll through the rut in the middle of the road. However when you set up camp in one area for an extended period of time you slow down, making it easy to get stuck.

I have been spinning my wheels lately trying to get out, but in actual fact I am just digging myself deeper. The whole “woh is me" speech is getting old and I need to ask for a push. I am not sure what form this push will come in but I have an idea of where to start.

I need to remember how everything is relative. The average here in Goma is not the average at home in Vancouver. The trials that I find myself struggling with here are not the same as the ones back at home. I need to see the silver lining in my frustrations.

Sure, I have found myself spinning my wheels this time, but once I get out of this rut I know there will be plenty more down the road. The question is, next time will I take charge and make an effort to avoid them?